Parties are the Work of The Enemy

Okay, so I got done with baking the scones and had only eaten a couple dark chocolate chips. Earlier in the day I had had a small bowl of cereal... So, I had been relatively good all day. Then it came to dinner time at the murder mystery party. I ate half the strawberries off of my Greek salad and a couple almond slivers, I had a spoonful of the coconut soup served to me, and then came the main course... Lasagna and garlic bread. I couldn't control myself. I ate everything on the stupid plate. It was awful! I was awful! It was like Satan himself had prepared dinner for me, tempting me and enticing me. I was mortified and felt the intense urge to purge, but someone surely would have heard me. I ate vanilla ice cream at dessert (since it was a birthday party) so as not to seem strange, and then in about two more hours I had a freaking sliver of German chocolate cake. It was the most horrific thing I could have possibly done to myself. All control exited my body and my brain was unable to stay stable against the current of my fatass actions.

I just got done with 36 minutes on the stationary bike. I'm going to go for another 24 to complete the full hour and then do some more if I can stand it. I have to stand it. I'm slowly creeping up to a regular weight of over 120 pounds. Plainly and simply, that will not fucking fly. I WILL be below 119 and I WILL do everything it takes to get there. There WILL be a daily checklist. It will be as follows below:

[ ] Under 800 calories
[ ] At least 2 miles walking/jogging
[ ] At least 30 minutes stationary biking
[ ] 1 pitcher of water, minimum
[ ] Dogs over at the park morning and night

If I obey and am able to check everything on this list off, at the end of the week I will walk down to the drugstore and buy myself a small, cheap cosmetic of some sort. AND, all the money that I would spend on food while I'm out of the house will be placed into a jar and spent on these small cosmetics. Meaning that tomorrow while I go to the movies with one of my friends I will put the money I would be spending on popcorn and soda into this jar so I can't spend it. It'll be like Hella motivation. I will be skinny. I will be lovely. I will be strong and in control.