My Journey

Monday, October 4, 2010

Break Time

My computer cable's wires are frayed and exposed. If I tilk them the wrong way, my computer shuts off. Fuck me. I'm writing a quickie about today, seeing as though it's almost 11 and I've still got 40 more pages to read. Starting to hate this book... Ugh. Today was a good day, food-wise, but a bad day all other ways. The girl who molested me has stained my life. Completely stained it. And I want to change schools, but my parents want to make a case for bullying against her. They'll never get one. She doesn't bully me so much as do every single activity simply so I can't. And make eye contact with me in the halls. And just be a generally ugly person. I hate being alive because of her. And I hate being alive because of her because of my parents. I wish I never had to see any of them ever again. Life would be managable if I changed school and never had to see her again. Life would be even more managable if my parents didn't need as much explaination as they're requesting.

I need a break from everything, and I know I'll never get one. I'm in this for life, baby, with no time to escape. It's always, GO GO GO. I don't think people realize that I have no time to just sit down and listen to music anymore. It only adds to the misery. I weigh 118 pounds. They're coming off. Now I just can't screw it up. Never again will I be 122. Time to read...

1 comment:

  1. this made me really really sad. you are such a lovely girl, i honestly mean that with all my heart, i want to see you shine happy like a happy little star. i wish the us wasn't so far away and so pricey to get to. but i'll get there one day, give you a real hug and tell you it will be ok, one day you can break free and live how you want. it just means for now you need to hold on xxx

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